


That Shirt is Horrible

by Nichomen



Category: New Warriors, Nova (Comics), Scarlet Spider (Comics)
Genre: M/M, Novakaine
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2015-01-17
Packaged: 2018-03-07 22:18:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3185252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nichomen/pseuds/Nichomen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Please don't wear any of those shirts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Shirt is Horrible

“But I think that shirt is cute, Kaine!”

“No.”

“No? you can’t just say ‘ _no,_ ’ Kaine!”

“ _Fuck_ no _.”_

Sam didn’t think he should be walking in on…whatever this was. Kaine versus Aracely: over what, he wasn’t sure. In each of their hands (and scattered across the floor, couch, the _room,)_ were shirts, _lots of shirts,_ yellow shirts, blue shirts, big shirts, small shirts, cotton shirts…leather shirts?

Alright cool. Maybe Kaine was going for a “Black Cat” look.

But the shirt in question—or more accurately, out of the question—was a bright, aqua blue piece, with little waves and orange cartoon fishes swimming horizontally across  Kaine’s belly.  

Kaine’s face was, heh, _scarlet_ red.

“It’s not stupid, Kaine! It’s super cute!”

“I disagree with your ‘opinion,’ Aracely, to point out the fact that this shirt is complete, utter—“

“Uh… Hi?...”

And for a moment the heated argument was put to a hold. First Kaine, then Aracely, turned their heads to see deer-in-headlights-Sam, helmet held like a stolen item between his hands. He was beginning to wish he’d slipped quietly past them instead.

“Hi Sam!”

Aracely’s face beamed, but Kaine only grumbled, struggling to wiggle out of the too-tight shirt confining him.

“You’re just in time, Sam—Kaine and I were just…”

“Right, just in time,” Sam cut her off, beginning to back up, eyes struggling to look at anything but his teammates, fingers rubbing little oily fingerprints into his helmet. “Just in time for that meeting with Vance—gotcha. He probably wanted me to like, pick up donuts, so I’m gonna, you know, go get those…for the next hour or something. You guys want any—“

Jesus, Aracely was way quicker than Sam remembered. Or maybe it’s just because without his helmet, or skateboard for that matter, he wasn’t even in the playing field to outrun her. Her fingers were curled around his shoulder, blunt nails pressed his skin.

“No, not for _that,_ for _this,”_ and with a jackal grin she pulled him forward to stand by her side before Kaine.

“This big guy here,” She pointed to Kaine, the only “big guy” in the room as far as Sam could tell, “has a date tonight, and he has to look _good._ But his choice in clothes is _boring,_ not good! You have to help me convince him to wear something cool!”

Before Sam could even process the thought of big, tough, scary Kaine on a date, a low groan practically crawled its way from the deepest depths of what Sam could only assume was Kaine’s _soul._

“Aracely, it’s not a date, it’s a _meeting.”_

“At a fancy restaurant in _New York City?_ And a _Broadway show?_ A _romantic one?_ Kaine, it’s a date, she’s totally disguising this date as a meeting!”

This sort of awkward tension was more than enough to spike a heated itch at the back of Sam’s neck, and he agreed with Aracely. _Totally_ a date.

Sam nodded. “Sounds like a date to me, Spidey.”

Aracely hummed in agreement, before tossing aside the plaid yellow flannel in her hands to pick up a crumpled cream-colored shirt.

“Alright Mister Boring, how about this? Is it simple enough for you?”

Kaine snatched it from her hands in an instant, stretching it out before them for Sam to get a clearer look. Embroidered to the heart of the shirt was a little crimson rabbit that was undoubtedly…cute. Yeah, cutes the right word. Sam’s cheeks filled suddenly with stifled laughter; but a snort did manage to escape him.

“This?! Where did you even get this—how—is this what you’ve been spending your allowance on?!”

Kaine’s voice was practically a bark, Sam couldn’t help but imagine him as a large angry dog, or maybe even a tiny angry spider. He liked the image either way.

Aracely rolled her eyes, retrieving the bunny shirt before discarding it into a pile of other limp, crumpled shirts on the couch, making Sam wonder exactly how long they’d been at this little fashion show.

“Well you never buy anything fun for yourself! Besides it’s fun! C’mon Sam! You gotta help me, or else Kaine’s date is going to be a disaster!” She dragged her fingers down her face in a melodramatic fashion before twirling back around, searching for another shirt to be judged, and ultimately rejected, by Kaine.

Sam didn’t really know what to do, in all honestly. At first he shuffled from one foot to the other, but when he got bored with that, he noticed a lost gray shirt tucked almost completely beneath the couch. He pulled it out, finding it to be soft to the touch, and inspecting it front and back, saw it to be safely plain.

“What about this?”

Aracely ceased her shuffling to look up, and Kaine’s lips curled into the hint of a smirk.

“Sam—come on! That’s literally the shirt Kaine woke up in _this morning._ And for like, probably the last few mornings. You’re killing me here!” She pounded her chest with one solid thump, making sure Sam knew about her broken heart.

Kaine reached for his shirt, yanking it from Sam’s hands before wrestling it back on.

“Case closed, Aracely, I think I’ll just wear this shirt then.”

A pained, accentuated “no,” followed by a continuous string of “O’s,” fell from Aracely’s lips.

“Well, he looks good to me,” Sam said, and for the most part, it was true. Kaine pretty much looked good in all the other shirts too, even the fishes one, so Sam didn’t really know what to say. “Besides, all these shirts are a little tight on him. It’s kind of distracting—“

Sam could feel the heat rise in his cheeks.

“I uh, I mean you know, they all have little patterns on them you know? And like—I mean, come on, even his costume has that big annoying spider on it even I get distracted—and it’s super tight so… wait.”

Sam’s words were beginning to feel like cotton in his mouth, the heat travelling to the back of his neck, the tips of his ears; his face felt like it was swelling.

“Yo, Sam’s totally been checking out Kaine.”

The chipper voice pierced the buildup of tension in the room. All three momentarily stunned heroes looked behind them to see both Speedball and Justice standing at the mountain’s entrance, a shit-eating grin on Robbie’s face, while Vance’s pained face was hidden behind his own splayed fingers.

Sam couldn’t get his helmet on fast enough. He wondered if it could shield the world from his embarrassment, though he was beginning to think the force of this feeling was far greater than a _twenty-ton force._

 _”_ Did you… want to start this meeting a little early, Nova?”

And without saying a word, Sam made quick strides to the control room ahead; and for as long as he’s been traveling at light-years speed to get from one side of the galaxy to the other, he was sure this was the quickest he’s ever made himself move.  


End file.
